Building a Connection

All praise is due to Allah ﷻ, Lord of the worlds and May His peace and blessings be upon His final prophet and messenger, Muhammad ﷺ.

Once in Madinah during the time of Rasulullah ﷺ, a companion, Aws bin Samit (rd) became displeased with his wife, Khowla bint Tha’labah (rd) and gave her a talaaq-e-zihaar. This was a type of divorce which was issued in the time of ignorance. The husband would say “You are to me like the back of my mother”. These words likened his relationship with his wife to his relationship with his mother and made his wife forbidden to him forever. Even after marrying another man, the wife would not be able to ever remarry her first husband again.

Khowla bint Tha’labah (rd) was an old woman and no longer at an age to remarry. Any person can imagine how distressed she must have felt and as was the habit of the companions, she ran to Rasulullah ﷺ with her problem.

Rasulullah ﷺ was residing at Aishah’s (rd) house at the time. Khowla (rd) came and said; “Oh Rasulullah ﷺ! My husband has given me a talaaq-e-zihaar. What do you command”?

Until this time, Rasulullah ﷺ had not received any revelation related to the matter and so he said; “Oh Khowla! You have become forbidden for him”. This was the ruling according to the customs of the time.

Upon hearing this reply, Khowla (rd) pleaded; “Oh Rasulullah ﷺ! He spent my wealth, exhausted my youth and my womb bore abundantly for him. When I became old and unable to bear children, he pronounced zihaar on me. Where shall I go and how will my children do their living?”

But once again Rasulullah ﷺ replied; “Oh Khowla! You have become forbidden for him.” She pleaded again; “Oh Rasulullah ﷺ! Please review your answer”. But Rasulullah ﷺ realised that Khowla (rd) was not going to listen so he bowed his head and did not reply.

Khowla (rd) saw this and so she said; “Oh Rasulullah ﷺ! I will complain directly to your lord”! She raised her hands to the heavens and she spoke quietly to Allah ﷻ; “Oh Allah! I bring my complaint directly to you. I have small children. I do not have the strength or money to feed them. Nor can I rely on their father as he has also become old. Oh Allah! Send a decision in my favour on your prophet’s tongue”. Suddenly the signs of revelation being revealed were noted on Rasulullah ﷺ and once he was relieved, he smiled; “Oh Khowla! Allah has revealed in regards to you and your husband.

Allah ﷻ revealed;

Indeed Allah has heard the talk of the woman who was debating with you concerning her husband and was complaining to Allah. And Allah was hearing the conversation between you both. Verily, Allah is All-Hearing, All-Seeing.

(Surah Mujadalah, verse 1)

Subhanallah! The connection that Khowla (rd) had with Allah ﷻ speaks directly to my soul. Just try to imagine yourself in the presence of Rasulullah ﷺ. How fortunate would that person be! No person would even think of asking anyone else for confirmation of what was said. Yet here was Khowla (rd). She was a woman and she was old. But her connection with Allah ﷻ was so strong that when she realised that Rasulullah ﷺ was not going to listen to her, she turned to Allah ﷺ. Not because she did not believe in Rasulullah ﷺ. But because she knew that Allah ﷻ answered the prayer of the person in distress.

In Surah Ghafir, Allah ﷻ says;

And your Lord says, “Call upon Me; I will respond to you.”

But when will Allah ﷻ respond?

He will “respond” when you believe in Him. When your conviction in Him is so strong that be it in a time of need or not, you know that Allah ﷻ is there for you. When you believe without a doubt, that He is forever present.

Take a look at Khowla (rd). What did she do that made her so special, that Allah ﷻ revealed the Qur’aan to Rasulullah ﷺ in response to her call. The only thing that she did was ask Allah ﷻ to reveal a ruling in her favour with conviction in her heart.

Khowla (rd) spoke to Allah ﷻ. She prolonged her call. She beautified her speech like she was talking to her lover. She did not just simply say “Oh Allah! Give me this!” She knew that Allah ﷻ knew. But she was pleading her case in the court of Allah ﷻ and in response, Allah ﷻ revealed the Qur’aan. How truly amazing is that! Khowla (rd) made one plea to Allah ﷻ. Just one plea!

In a narration, Aishah (rd) says; “Pure is He, whose hearing encompasses all things. I heard what Khowla bint Tha’labah said about her husband while some of it I could not hear despite being so close to her in the same room, but Allah ﷻ heard her all her conversation and said; “Indeed, Allah has heard…”

Subhanallah! Allah ﷻ is All-Hearing, All-seeing. Allah ﷻ truly is the one who hears your plea, who hears your cry for help. He really is the only one who will not break your heart. When you call Him lovingly, when you call to Him in distress, when you talk to Him like there is no one else that you love more than Him, He will answer your call. And if you feel that Allah ﷻ has not answered your call, don’t feel disheartened. Just think that Allah ﷻ wants you to talk to Him for longer. Don’t demand from Allah ﷻ. He is not the one who is in need of us. Talk to Him! Plead with Him. Beg Him. Cry to Allah ﷻ. Plant your seed of hope in your prayers and see the miracles that grow in your life!

The key point to this lesson is we have to build a connection with Allah ﷻ if we want him to respond to our call and there is no better time to do this than in the month of Ramadhaan.

In a hadeeth, Rasulullah ﷺ says;

“When Ramadhaan begins, the gates of Paradise are opened, and the gates of Hell are closed, and the devils are chained up.”

(al-Bukhaari, 3277; Muslim, 1079)

Here is a golden opportunity. We have to take advantage of it. We have to build a connection with Allah ﷻ today. We cannot wait for tomorrow. Who has been promised the next minute, let alone tomorrow? We cannot wait around for next Ramadhaan. Who knows whether we will even see next Ramadhaan? There is only about a week left of Ramadhaan. How many of us can say that we have truly connected with Allah ﷻ in this month? How many of us can say that without a doubt we will not turn back to our old ways because our connection with Allah ﷻ is stronger than before?

Build a connection with Allah ﷻ before it’s too late. No one needs to know how you’re building your connection. That is between you and Allah ﷻ. All you need to remember is that it does not have to be something great. Start small. Give charity. Recite the Qur’aan more often. Stand up for the night pray. Anything. Just as long as you are doing something.

I know that this is easier said than done. We face obstacles in our path in the form of our own wishes and desires. We all have our ups and downs. But that’s ok. That’s life. We’re bound to have a bumpy ride. But as long as we are trying to connect with Allah ﷻ, we will Insha Allah be getting somewhere.

A wise person once said;

“The path to Allah ﷻ is long. It is not important that you reach the end. What is important is that you are on this path when you die.”

All praise is due to Allah ﷻ at the beginning and at the end.

May you be rewarded for visiting and May we all benefit. Ameen.

The Katibah.

Resources used:

Ma’riful Quran
Tafseer Ibn Katheer


Modesty Never Goes Out of Fashion!

All praise is due to Allah swt, the lord of the worlds and may His peace and blessings be upon His final prophet and messenger, Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wasallam.


Rasulullah  sallallahu alayhi wasallam is reported to have said, “Every religion has a characteristic. The characteristic of Islam is modesty.” (Ibn Majah)

I pray you are reading this in the best of health, wealth and Imaan. Ameen. What you are about to read is a subject that i feel should be very important to each and every one of us.  Compiled together by my collegues and i (on a very short notice i might add) and delivered to a female audience. I shall let you read on. :).

Rasulullah sallallahu alayhi wasallam has mentioned in a hadeeth:

الحياء شعبة من الايمان
Modesty is part of faith.

(Saheeh Al-Bukhari & Saheeh Muslim)

Imaan has many branches and of its most important branch is modesty.  Modesty gives a believer fear within one’s own self. It saves a person from sin. It helps a believer to make a judgement on how they should behave, how they should dress, the tone they should use within their surroundings, regardless of where they are or who they maybe with, amongst other things.

The term modesty according to the English dictionary means behaviour, manner or appearance intended to avoid impropriety or indecency.

However the original meaning of modesty according to a believer’s nature refers to a bad and uneasy feeling accompanied by embarrassment, caused by ones fear of being exposed for some unworthy or indecent conduct.

Rasulullah sallallahu alayhi wasallam has stated: Verily, modesty and faith are inter-related.  Where one is taken out, the other diminishes simultaneously. (Bayhaqi)

We learn from this hadeeth that modesty plays a very important role in the life of a Muslim. One of the things Rasulullah sallallahu alayhi wasallam feared Most for his Ummah was lack of shame and the sad fact my sisters, is that we have succumbed to the ways of those who are against the teachings of the Quran and Sunnah. We are living in a time where we are constantly exposed to shamelessness. When we first see something lewd and vulgar, if our Imaan is intact we feel disturbed. However when we see the same thing over and over again, we don’t even realise what the big deal is. Then when we begin to ask ourselves “what is the big deal?! what is the issue here?!”, understand that we are becoming spiritually bankrupt. Our Imaan is weakening and thus we are becoming distant from Allah swt. Allah forbid.

In this day and age due to our surroundings and environment we can easily be misled. Let us take the example of our young brothers and sisters who wear football T-shirts of the team they support, with the name of their adored player printed on it.  Without saying a word, simply by their dress code, they show the world who or what they value and support. Without doubt, it causes people to look and see. It turns people’s attention towards something which is not necessarily halaal.

Your question may be how is this possible? My answer, is quite simple. The purpose of clothing is to cover our awrah, not to reveal any form, shape or size. It is not in any way a means for the opposite gender to turn his or her neck or raise their gaze.

The purpose of the fashion industry is NOT to cover the body. It believes that the main purpose of clothing is sexual attraction. We are living in an age where showing more skin is in and leaving the house without make up is a no-no! As a matter of fact, the image, this fashion Industry has tried so hard to show is the less you wear the more freedom you gain.

My words, my sisters, may seem harsh, but in truth whether we are ready to admit it or not this is a reality many of us have fallen prey to.

Our beloved Habeeb sallallahu alayhi wasallam has said in a hadeeth:

اذا لم تستحيى فاصنع ما شئت
when you have no shame do as you please.

(Saheeh Al-Bukhari)

This hadeeth speaks volume when it comes to the fashion Industry. Sadly, we, as believing women are allowing ourselves to be swept away by the western culture. Why have we, as believing women, abandoned modest clothing? Have we really thought about the consequences? Do we do this to ourselves so that we may feel or look attractive?  Is it because we feel insecure? Do we feel we need to fit in and be accepted?

Our clothing is a symbolic language we speak to those around us. Our clothes are a form of communication, a message. Our appearance speaks values; many times it speaks louder than words. Our clothing should be a sense of Islamic identity. There should be no doubt that WE are believing women. We should not be mistaken for anything but a Muslim woman. Most definitely, when we cover as we should, we will be recognized as respected Muslimaat.

Allah swt so beautifully mentions in surah Ah’zaab ayah 59:

O Nabi (sallallahu alayhi wasallam)! Tell your wives, your daughters and the women of the Mu’mineen that they should draw down their ‘jalaabeeb’ over themselves. This is best for their recognition so that they are not harmed. Allah is oft forgiving, most merciful. (33:59)

The words “this is best for their recognition” refers to Free women because slaves are not required to cover themselves in the manner that we are.

As for The words “so they are not harmed” here means so that the women are not teased or made fun of like the slaves in the time of Rasulullah sallallahu alayhi wasallam.  This shows that through our outer garments Allah swt is providing us with a means of preserving ourselves for whom we are halaal i.e. the husband. Men by nature are jealous and do not wish for others to “check out” their respective wives. We should want to preserve our beauty from others and share it with our husband only.

WE should acknowledge that we are following the example of the “best generation” of Muslims. The wives and daughters of Rasulullah sallallahu alayhi wasallam as well as the wives of the companions covered completely. They were the most pious of women who we should try to be like. Undoubtedly if we dress appropriately we will be treated with respect as a human being. People will be forced to listen to the words we speak. Rather than concentrate on what we look like and this, my sisters is Freedom, because it is our speech that is heard and not our body language.

My sisters! Let me end with something we can all think back to.

Stated in Saheeh Al-Bukhari And Saheeh Muslim, Aishah rd says: One day we were sitting with Nabi sallallahu alayhi wasallam and Faatimah rd came.  She used to walk exactly like the Nabi of Allah sallallahu alayhi wasallam. Nabi sallallahu alayhi wasallam said “Oh my daughter come and sit down. Then he came close to her and whispered in her ear. Faatimah rd began to cry profusely. When Rasulullah sallallahu alayhi wasallam saw her grief, he whispered something for the second time and she calmed down. When Nabi sallallahu alayhi wasallam stood up and excused himself. Aishah rd says, i said: “Oh Faatimah! what was the secret between you and your father?” Faatimah rd replied “I will not disclose the secret”.

When Nabi sallallahu alayhi wasallam passed away, Aishah rd said “Oh Faatimah! now tell me, the Nabi of Allah sallallahu alayhi wasallam is gone”. She said “Let me tell you now. When I came and i sat down, he whispered in my ear and he told me “Faatimah! Listen my daughter! Listen my daughter! Every year Jibraeel comes and he recites the Quran to me once. This year he read the Quran to me twice. I think my time is up and i will be moving onwards from this world. Faatimah hold on patiently. Be patient and make sabr! Make sabr, Oh Faatimah! When he saw that i became emotional, he whispered in my ear again and he said “Faatimah you will be the first to join me after i have gone”.

Six months later, Faatimah rd comes to Asma bint Umais rd, who is the wife of Abu Bakr rd, the former wife of Jafar ibn Abi Talib rd. She says to her “The time has come.  I will be leaving this world. Oh Asma! I am going to pass away but i have observed in funerals, the women’s organs are slightly exposed. I am very worried. After i die, please see that my body is covered”. Asma rd breaks some branches. She makes a coffin and she says “I observed this practice in Abyssinia”. She then takes a Cloth and she covers it.  Faatimah rd says “This is what i want to do”.

She passes away six months after Rasulullah sallallahu alayhi wasallam. During these six months she does not smile once. But when she was told that decent arrangements can be made so that her body will be covered totally after her death, she brings a smile to her face. She said “Oh Asma! I am leaving this world, I entrust you to give me a shower”.

My sisters, what was the Modesty of Faatimah bint Muhammad?  Rasulullah sallallahu alayhi wasallam told Faatimah rd “On the day of judgement, when humanity will assemble, Faatimah rd will also stand up and an announcer will announce. Oh people lower your gaze, Faatimah bint Muhammad wants to cross. Every man will drop his gaze and Faatimah rd will cross.

My sister, modesty is a sign of a person’s closeness to the creator. How many times have we heard of the word haya or modesty? Have we really thought over what it means? I pray that my words have given you something to think about and I pray to Allah swt that he first gives me the ability to act upon what I have said and then to all of you. Ameen.

All praise  is for Allah swt at the beginning and at the end.

May you be rewarded for visiting my page and may we all benefit. Ameen.

The Katibah.

Resources used:

Dec 2018
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